Heidi Montag

The charge: Dropping her husband, Spencer Pratt, as her longtime manager and replacing him with psychic healer Aidan Chase.

For the prosecution:
Several faces ago, a bright eyed and capable of smiling Montag left the hillsides of Crested Butte Colorado, and headed west to fame(?) and fortune (??). After hooking up with Laguna Beach babe Lauren Conrad, Heidi rose to levels of fame whoring comparable to the likes of those with socialite parents, trust funds, and regular access to the sexually transmitted diseases of the ostensibly rich and famous. It was through her partnership/face time on Laguna Beach spin-off The Hills, that Montag met her true partner in shameless publicity, Spencer Pratt. The duo branded themselves as a God fearing, squeaky clean, photog friendly two-some, and Pratt began the journey of pimping his nubile-now bride out to any media outlet with a spotlight and an audience greater than seven. After lackluster success as a bikini clad pop act, Montag- against the reported wishes of Pratt-underwent ten plastic surgery procedures in one sitting, nearly dying in the process. Upon her recovery, and repeated failure as a pop princess, Montag dropped Pratt as her manager, replacing him with psychic healer Aidan Chase. In doing so, she said,

"I am going to have Aiden Chase help manage my new life and career in a very different and positive way with light and love. The time for change is now. Never mix business and pleasure. We are no longer Speidi but Spencer and Heidi." (Source: People Magazine)

The Verdict:
Innocent, by reason of leaking cheek implants.

This court hereby orders Heidi Montag to stop getting her body modified before her remaining chin bone falls off into Spencer's greasy glued-on looking beard.

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